VHS – I Heard They Suck…Blood Review

Fast Rites: because sometimes brevity is fundamental.

By naming their band VHS, these Ontario Nosferatu lovers have made it clear they have no interest in modernity and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. That being said, simply labeling them OSDM isn’t quite right either. While they channel 90’s death metal, this isn’t Bolt Thrower or Morbid Angel worship. VHS focuses on short schlock of the most grin-inducing kind. Think Embalmer with Midnight’s love of sleaze all funneled through a vampire theme. You need to look no further than the song title “Fake Blood And Push Up Bras” to understand where this album is going.

Release date: December 3, 2021. Label: Wiseblood Records.
That love of over-the-top death is further cemented on I Heard They Suck…Blood with a litany of movie and TV samples strewn through every song that incorporates such disparate sources as The Lost Boys, Let Me In, The Monster Squad (a personal favorite), and even The Simpsons. That love for The Lost Boys shines through a second time when they add a little sexy sax solo to “The Frog Brothers.”


Whether it’s the 80’s mid-tempo guitar punctuated by rhythmic hits in “Horror of Dracula,” the slow burn of “Martin, Martin, “ the martial drumming and somber guitar behind a doomy riff in “I’m Sorry Abby” or the swagger-soaked leads in “A Town Called Purgatory” and the aforementioned “Fake Blood And Push Up Bras”, VHS show that while they may be interested in sucking blood they know how to avoid sucking the fun out of death metal while they do it.

Plus, one of death metal’s greatest ambassadors in Trevor Strnad put his stamp of approval on not one but TWO different songs in the form of guest vocals.

Hit play, bite your lover and bang your head!

Posted by Spencer Hotz

Admirer of the weird, the bizarre and the heavy, but so are you. Why else would you be here?

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