Category: Reviews
Mortiferum – Disgorged From Psychotic Depths Review
It’s probably for the best if we address the elephant in the room right away so we can get to the true business of the matter. That’s some butthole. Maybe that sentence should have ended …
Car Bomb – Mordial Review
Pew-pew-pew-pew-pew!! Zz-zz-zz-aaaap! Look out losers, the lasers shooting out of “Dissect Yourself” are here to embarrass Rings of Saturn and make Gigan take themselves less seriously. TL;DR: Car Bomb are fucking back, and it’s exactly …
White Ward – Love Exchange Failure Review
Extreme music is an evocative artform that inspires a lot of great album covers. Every metalhead can rattle off a few classics that screamed DANGER in their eager youth, or recent releases that caught their …
Insomnium – Heart Like A Grave Review
How difficult it must be to follow a perfect album. Wait, wait… Not that kind of perfect album. Perfection is a pipe dream, and there are no perfect albums. Sorry, Pink Floyd, Rush, Prince, Public …
Midnight Prey – Uncertain Times Review
Think back to college. Or maybe you have to go back to high school. Maybe you were homeschooled and didn’t go to either. In that case, let’s just have everybody think back to the first …
No One Knows What The Dead Think – No One Knows What The Dead Think Review
On these fine digital pages, we once wrote that “… most rational humans hate grind.” This remains an accurate statement. Grind is what “normal” people hear when you play them any sort of metal. “He’s …
Megaton Sword – Niralet Review
While it’s possible to let us know how much you can bench press by commenting on this here review, Last Rites as a collective is pretty sure that it ain’t enough to wield a sword …
The Neptune Power Federation – Memoirs Of A Rat Queen Review
This is a bit of a Choose Your Own Review review. Turn to section A for sass, turn to section B for elegiac nonsense, turn to a different browser if you are a no-account doofus. …